I opened a door for some guy about my age walking into this apartment complex. I was walking out the door and noticed that he was coming in with both arms full of clean new laundry. So I open the door, walk out, and hold it for him.
Did he say "Thank You?"
Nope.
That Fuckhead walked right in like he owned the place. He didn’t even have the sense to nod or anything. Fuck. It’s not like anyone is going to think you’re gay for having a guy hold the door for you. Besides, I WAITED for his ass. He was 15 feet away and I had the common decency to wait for him.
He's lucky he didn’t get his ass beat down from me like the Fucking Ninja That I Am. There are however, several factors that did save this guy's life. Allow me to list them.
1. Ninja Code dictates that I kill only in self defense. I think.
2. I was holding a piece of Pizza in my hand at the time (Pepperoni and Sausage). He's not worth the cheese that gets stuck to the Pizza box. I love that stuff.
3. I can’t fight.
4. He looked really mean.
5. I love The Internets (What I mean is. Instead of saying something timely and clever, I waited till I got to work to enter my thoughts, spell check them, and proofread them several times which only proves that not only am I officially not the Ninja I thought I was but I am also a pussy. That makes me even more mad, because what this person did was not only insult me with his lack of manners, but brought me to this horrible realization and now it makes me dislike him even more.)
Thank you Mr. "Im to good to say thank you".
I fucking hate you.
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4 comments:
If I were you, I would wait in my apartment with fresh pizza watching for him to have laundry day. Then I would run down there and hold the door closed while eating your delicious 'za.
I'm so with you there Josh. It's common decency to acknowledge the fact that someone has done something nice for you and people like that should be vanished hehe.
Everyone does it these days, especially rich people. Aparantly Volcom shirts and rags hangin' out your pocket designates you as door boy. Well, fuck 'em I say.
I've been in the habit lately of telling them they are "fucking welcome" and that "I should get to fuck their wife/daughter/gf" for being corial enough to have some goddamn manners. this sort of shit pisses me off royaly. Last Friday night I actually ran ahead to hold a door open for a guy and his gf, after the walked in like it's their privaledge, no nod nothing. I then waited for her bf to walk in, and slammed the door on his fucking achilles. Cocksucker.
Cuddled0ck
Next time take his Downy ball and shove it up his cornhole.
You rock Zombs
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